On my flight home from a recent vacation I thought about my trip. Aside from being grateful to escape the frigid temperatures, I realized how much fun I had.
I couldn’t help but think back to an earlier time, after my daughter and husband passed, when I felt, How could I ever be happy again?
I remembered the first time I laughed, and asked myself, How can I be laughing after what’s happened to our family?And then my laughter turned to tears. I thought about how every celebration had become bittersweet. I recalled my father’s words before he passed, promising me I would have joy again in my life, something I could not have imagined.
As time passed, I gradually allowed myself moments of happiness which were followed by feelings of confusion and an underlying sadness.
After many years I finally gave myself permission to experience pleasure, being happy for Michelle, and doing things that made her happy. This poem describes how I began living for the both of us.
As long as I can I will look at this world for the both of us.
As long as I can I will laugh with the birds,
I will sing with the flowers,
I will pray to the stars,
For the both of us.
I was happy on my vacation, and noticed the little signs that let me know my daughter and my husband were there watching me, and they were happy I was happy.
Wishing you moments of happiness with warm energy guiding you from within,