April 2017

Apr 28, 2017 | Parent Column


 My older son, Larry Marcus was killed in an auto accident at college on 4-14-83 at the age of 23 yrs. It happened a few months before he was to get his degree from the Univ. of Georgia. His birthday is Sept 10, 1959. He is gone more years than I want to remember.

Every year at his birthday and the anniversary of his death I send emails to his many friends and a few of his professors that I still have contact with. As the years get longer I hear from less and less of the friends. People’s lives change, they move forward with their lives, they are busy with their own lives.

I have a piano in Temple Beth David, Commack, N.Y. in honor of Larry, who was a talented musician. I found out a number of years ago when Larry started college at the University of Georgia , he and others formed a band. They played at school functions and social causes on campus and they called themselves “The Little Tigers”. They never made it big. However, in the house next door to them another group did make it big, and very, very famous. It is R.E.M. and they would invite Larry to join them sometimes and play the keyboard with them. Larry never told me this. Several of his group of highly, intellectual group members informed me of this many years ago.  When I heard that the group was breaking up I wrote to Michael Stipes and introduced myself and asked if he had any music with Larry playing with them. He remembered my son but had his secretary write back that he was sorry that he had nothing to share with me.

 About a month ago I was in a store that sells new and used CD, DVD, Cassette, etc. and saw behind the counter a R.E.M. new CD. I started talking to the owner and told him the above story. He quietly went on his computer and put Larry’s name in and showed me that his name was mentioned in a book some author wrote about R.E.M. a few years ago.

 Larry had great potential to be anything in this world, had time permitted  him to do so. His professors all agree with what I just said. However, it was not meant to be. His major was Comparative Literature and a minor in Russian. One of his professors always writes me and tells me how much she admires what I do to keep Larry’s memory alive. As long as I am able, I will continue to do so.

 They say time is a healer but my heart still breaks without Larry in my life. I was cheated out of watching my son growing up, getting married, and having a family and grandchildren. My son, Ken, was cheated out of growing up and having a relationship with his older brother. Ken is now 51 years old, lives in Oakland, Calif. and married to Laura. I have 2 beautiful granddaughters, Lyla, named for Larry and Talia, named for 1 of Laura’s brothers.  But there is always a hole in my heart for Larry, and always will be. I miss him so and think about him each and every day.

 I am thankful for the years I had him in my life but they were cut short too soon.  Ken and I just put 2 bricks in the labyrinth at Eisenhower Park to go to for comfort and remembrance.

The bricks read:

Larry Marcus

Alas he can not sing. But

died with his music in him

I had a tree and plaque put on the campus of UGA and many of us got together to celebrate “Larry’s life”. The first time we did the planting friends came from all over and many had not seen each other since graduation.

The love of his life, Mig and I still talk. She married, has 2 children that have graduated college, but still she tells me how she still has a hole in her heart for Larry.  The plaque in front of the tree at Reed Hall on the campus of U. of Georgia reads:

“His quest for knowledge never ceased”.

With great love,

Sandy Wolfson